Discoverizing the Robin Hood Case

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Steven Gilbert

Yesterday, I filed a discovery request with royal court jester Thomas Mullins. In it, I ask for all evidence related to the case against Robin Hood of Keene. The city, led by the prince and building its case through the riddle-loving royal jester, have made all sorts of baseless and vague allegations against those associated with Robin Hood of Keene. The degradations took a patronizingly condescending turn recently when city powers had one of their minions, Steven Gilbert, go on the attack through yet another antagonizing editorial. Fortunately, the Sentinel is just as able to verify its claims as the city, which is to say that they were heavy on allegations and insinuations, and frail on fact. Gilbert’s intentionally misleading diatribe may deserve its own response, but at the moment, with more pressing matters on the table than the opinions of an ailing dinosaur, I intend to cut through such static with the important ultimatum Robin Hood and friends have been awaiting since allegations against us began spewing from city officials prior to the filing of the frivolous lawsuit. With my request for discovery, I am demanding from the royal deviants the evidence that they have gone to such lengths to keep obscured. What honor has a man who makes false claims against numerous upstanding members of the community, and insists he possess evidence supporting such claims? How long can one continue the allegations before the final shreds of faith in their person wither? Actions speak where words are banter, and as time passes, the banter becomes easier to isolate. Prince John, Jester keene_papertigerMullins, and the royal henchmen and spinsters have for too long continued preaching falsehoods against Robin Hood and the Merry (wo)Men. Within ten days, I expect a response from the Jester as is obligated by the rules of the court. Will the city be able to manufacture their alleged video evidence of Robin Hooder harassment, or will the world be lulled by the softening roars of another paper tiger?

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