As some of you are already aware local bully and tyrant, Fred Parsells, submitted a letter to the Keene Sentinel titled: Stealing from Keene taxpayers, early last week. In it he actually suggests that the residents of Keene should blame their high property tax on the Robin Hooders. I immediately submitted my own rebuttal but it was denied because it did not meet the Sentinel’s standards. It would seem that it is quite alright for Fred to call the Robin Hooders thieves but not for me to call him a busybody and a parasite. Here is my submission:
In response to Fred Parsell’s letter “Stealing from Keene taxpayers.”
Sorry Fred, you got it wrong. The Robin Hood of lore was not stealing from the rich and giving to the poor. He was in fact taking money back from an oppressive government that stole through forced taxation and giving it back to the rightful owners. The taxpayers. A lot of folks don’t seem to understand that part.
Something else people might not be clear about: This year the city estimates it will take in $634,406 from meter collections and fines, but will end up spending $602,000 on the parking enforcement operating costs for a whopping total gain of $32,406. Does anyone not see a problem here? The fines and collection barely pay for the enforcers and their uniforms. So why even have them? If the city managers believe it’s so important to get folks to visit downtown and spend their money, why risk scaring them away with nasty tickets?
The bottom line here: Fred, who has been living off the backs of the taxpayers his whole working career, can’t fathom the idea of a community operating with any efficiency without the heavy hand of a tax-payer funded city government making every decision for us. The answer is the free market. If Keene is to survive the coming days, it must evolve past this mentality that government is the only solution to all of its problems.
Fred, what do you actually do? Besides collecting $56,610 a year in pension and $x/year as a housing inspector. Every time I’ve seen you downtown you’re either helping the parking enforcers write tickets or washing chalk off the sidewalks with your little spray bottle. You’re nothing but a busybody and a meddler. If you really cared about the taxpayer, you’d quit your job and give back some of that pension.
Conan Salada – Candidate for City Council – ward 4
Airing on this week’s AKPF #1 timeslot is an unprecedented revamp of Dolus, a prior episode. The infamous CoK official DPRK video of the ‘doctored’ Robin Hooding is replaced with courtroom footage to put you in the action with cast and dedicated fans of the Aqua Keene Parking Force. Additionally, fans receive more content from amateur videographer Peter ‘Sturdy’ Thomas, who did not appear in the court proceedings. See for yourself why AKPF is #1 in the Robin Hood:
Last Monday, the Keene Sentinel ran a letter to the editor from petty-tyrant Fred Parsells titled Stealing from Keene taxpayers. Fred writes, in part, “Since my earliest years, I have always been of the belief that the English folklore tale of Robin Hood was about a man and his band of merry men who stole from the rich and gave to the poor.
Fast forward 60-plus years and now I, and those of us who live and pay taxes in Keene, are confronted with a variation on the theme in that a modern day group of individuals, who have adopted the name Robin Hood(ers), are in my opinion stealing from the people of Keene, of which the overwhelming majority are surely far from rich… The end result is that Keene property taxes will be raised accordingly in order to balance the loss of revenue.”
I wrote a response to Fred’s letter, which was published today (Pumpkin Fest day – which likely means more paper sales) which reads:
On Oct. 14, The Keene Sentinel published a letter to the editor from Code Enforcement Officer Fred Parsells, in which he said “I have always been of the belief that the English folklore tale of Robin Hood was about a man and his band of merry men who stole from the rich and gave to the poor.”
He then went on to say that the Robin Hooders who plug parking meters are “stealing” from the “far-from-rich Keene taxpayers” by plugging parking meters and saving those same “far-from-rich Keene taxpayers” from $5 parking tickets.
However, Parsells begins on a flawed understanding of the tale of Robin Hood. Robin Hood did not steal from the rich and give to the poor. The poor were having their wealth confiscated by Prince John, so Robin Hood stepped in to take that wealth back from the king’s men to return it to the poor.
Parsells also claims to be concerned about the taxpayers, yet he receives a taxpayer-funded pension as a retired member of the Keene Police Department, and a paycheck as a code enforcer. Fred claims that by preventing people from getting parking tickets, the Robin Hooders will cause property taxes to “be raised accordingly in order to balance the loss of revenue.”
If Fred were really concerned about the taxpayer, he would not only resign his position as a code enforcer and surrender his pension, but he would advocate for the City Council to eliminate the code enforcement department. Inhabitants and business-owners spend nearly $3 million per year on licenses, permits and fees, and untold amounts of money complying with various zoning regulations and other ordinances that dictate how one is to live or work.
The two code enforcement officers, of which Fred Parsells is one, make a total of $122,588 per year. This directly costs the taxpayers more than any amount of Robin Hooding will ever supposedly cost (assuming that helping people comply with the parking ordinances — i.e. preventing the collection of a fine — actually costs money).
As a candidate for mayor, and the only opposition to Kendall Lane, I fully support the abolition of the code enforcement department and all zoning ordinances. There are several municipalities in New Hampshire that have no zoning. Nationally, there are large cities that have no zoning, Houston being the largest city without zoning ordinances.
Homeowners care about their safety, and have an inherent interest in making sure they live in a house that won’t fall in on itself. People should not be forced by government dictate to live in a building that meets someone else’s standards.
I would like to make one slight correction, Fred is a Housing Inspector, not a Code Enforcer. The 2012-2013 budget listed 1.34 Housing Inspectors at a total cost of $56,585. The entire budget for the Health & Code Enforcement Department for FY 2012-2013 is $903,663.
While attending the three day long trial of Rich Paul, friend of Free Keene ‘Amish Paul’ was ticketed twice in two days. During that trial, courtroom doors were locked between breaks in which no re-entry was permitted. Having received a green flier from Robin Hood of Keene suggesting he consider challenging the ticket, Paul took the two tickets to court, and on October 17, a trial was held in his honor.
Paul was requested to arrive at 10:00am, and entering the courtroom shortly thereafter, he found one parking enforcer already awaiting the proceedings in the audience. The state’s prosecutor approached Paul and informed him that one ticket was being prosecuted today, and the other dismissed, as only one of the two parking enforcers who had issued the tickets was available for court. Delighted to have achieved one victory before the contest started, he would wait through another forty-five minutes of pretrial hearings and plea deals before the parking ticket case was called.
Since the lawsuit against Robin Hood and the Merry People was initiated in May, it seems Keene can’t go too long without another story and additional coverage of the ongoing case popping up. In its Thursday, October 10 edition, the Keene State College Equinox published an article on the local oddity. Bethany Ricciardi penned the piece which features quotes from Robin Hooders as well as observations from the student body. You can read the article through the Equinox’s website or from a scan of the print edition.
A post on the website of famed conspiracy theorist David Icke today reported on the Robin Hood case using WMUR’s coverage of the lawsuit produced in the days following its filing. Icke is known for advancing the belief that many powerful global figures are secretly a species of shape-shifting reptilians. (more…)
Your AKPF #1 installment this week Adequate Koexistence Personify Flourish is sure to spark continued controversy while informing the civilization of happenings in Keene and around the world. Airing October 14 2013 on Cheshire TV, AKPF #1 features the brave men and women of the Aqua Keene Parking Force official DPRK units exposing and documenting the activities of other central committee authorities and civilians. A Tribe Called Quest snags the intro music slot and rhymes on Midnight. Graham assists AKPF evening patrol featuring reflective safety vest. James and Garret reminisce on the solidarity building of the Occupy movement with pizza and cupcakes in Central Square after the end of the Free Battleground Keene Wars protests. In reflection, the scene of the first day of evidentiary hearings, August 12 2013 is recalled as James and Graham are sprayed with a hose by a bureaucrat trying to execute their chalkings. Robin Hood of Keene uncreative censorship by DPRK affiliates gets fancy pants all wet. Ji (Ji’e’toh Dog, co-host of Black Sheep Rising fame) contemplates a parking meter’s utility to the pursuit of his joy. Ridley talks about Jesus interpreted by European standards as applied to Robin Hooding. Ridley ambush interviews the governor about state police misaction, governor Hassan, Margaret does not speak or acknowledge, declines to shake hands of united states military veterans. Chris Sununu encounters the Ridley Cam regarding singing songs in liquor stores and banishment de no trespass orders per NH Liquor Commission. Finally, DPRK officials claiming authority over the AKPF gather before court and Jester Mullins delivers an infamous monologue about putting the truth aside and doing one’s institutional duty to “fight on that lie”.
