Official DPRK presents Unofficial DPRK

by | Jan 6, 2014 | 0 comments

In further exploration of their counterpart six thousand miles away, the Democratic dprk-unicorn-1203People’s Republic of Keene is airing a special during the AKPF #1 timeslot showcasing current events in the unofficial DPRK of Northern Korea. This educational installment follows similar paths taken by Music of Unofficial DPRK from last week, covering such stories as training dogs attacking mannequins, state media spokespersons, and the purging of Jang Song Thaek from high ranking party positions. Stay tuned to the end for a dance party DPRK style and a quick promo from the central committee inauguration at Keene city hall.

Robin Hood Saga is Keene Sentinel’s Top Story of 2013

by | Jan 1, 2014 | 0 comments

The ongoing Robin Hood of Keene court and street performance has been overwhelmingly decided by readers as the top story of 2013. Approximately eighty-nine percent of the final vote favored the story out of the nine other options. Printed on the back page of section A in the December 31 edition, we may expect more coverage in the next year and beyond as the court saga proceeds towards the supreme realm. The Sentinel took a break from publishing on the January 1 holiday, and will resume the presses on Thursday. Previously released on youtube is a video from the Sentinel discusses the Robin Hood story as it developed over the year.

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DPRK Denounces Robin Hood Ruling

by | Dec 30, 2013 | 3 comments

akpf_dprkappeal1xIn a followup to their previous two videos, one published to youtube and another to their official website, the bureaucrats behind the Democratic People’s Republic of Keene have crafted a new video message denouncing a Cheshire superior court judge’s ruling in their lawsuit against the merry people associated with Robin Hood of Keene. The ruling that was handed down on December 3 determined that no civil claims were legally actionable given the protections granted in the first amendment of the US lanekendall_bestmayordprkconstitution. The judge declined to elaborate on implications which may or may not be granted by the more eloquent NH state constitution.

The new piece of content by the City people is brief and to the point. Commemorating the re-elected person who won the mayor contest, the video also serves as a new year’s update from the officials and to the civilianry that is claimed representative dominion over. Meanwhile in DPRK, Robin Hooding continues unabated.

No Arrests Yet in Pearl Street Homicide

by | Dec 28, 2013 | 0 comments

keenenhcbshomicideWhile police continue to investigate a fatal shooting at a Pearl Street residence in Keene, no arrests have been made and no suspects publicly identified. Last Saturday evening, David Wheelock was found in his home moments after an unknown assailant had killed him with multiple gunshots. Few details have been revealed this week by the NH Attorney General’s office. It has been disclosed that the upstairs neighbor of Wheelock, Nicholas Coll, heard the shots and discovered his injured neighbor and notified emergency services. The following day, state and local agencies investigated as a snow cover slowly melted. An article on the continuing search for clues was published today in the Keene Sentinel. On December 26, an article about homicides related to the Keene area was published that highlighted facts known up to that point on the Pearl Street homicide, as well as the killing of Chesterfield man in Windsor, Connecticut and an update on a missing persons case that had since been charged as a murder in Unity, NH.

Merry Christmas from Edward Snowden

by | Dec 25, 2013 | 1 comment

Everyone’s favorite National Security Agency whistleblower has released a Christmas message to the people of the world. Cheers!

[vimeo http://vimeo.com/82666985]

Hi, and Merry Christmas. I’m honored to have a chance to speak with you and your family this year. Recently, we learned that our governments, working in concert, have created a system of worldwide, mass surveillance, watching everything we do. Great Britain’s George Orwell Hong Kong Protesters Call on Government to Protect Snowdenwarned us of the danger of this kind of information. The types of collections in the book — microphones and videocameras, TVs that watch us — are nothing compared to what we have available today. We have sensors in our pocket that track us everywhere we go. Think about what this means for the privacy of the average person. A child born today will grow up with no conception of privacy at all. They’ll never know what it means to have a private moment to themselves — an unrecorded, unanalyzed thought. And that’s a problem, because privacy matters. Privacy is what allows us to determine who we are, and who we want to be. The conversation occurring today will determine the amount of trust we can place both in the technology that surrounds us, and the government that regulates it. Together we can find a better balance, end mass surveillance, and remind the government that if it really wants to know how we feel, asking is always cheaper than spying. For everyone out there listening, thank you, and Merry Christmas.